Friday, January 18, 2013

WoW Life Coach - Compassionate Criticism

Today's topic comes from a conversation with a good friend about how to talk to people in a compassionate way

There is a reason that some people are called "Elitist jerks" because they are. You do not have to be one of those people

NOTE: This is not meant to be a criticism of the website Elitist Jerks, where you can find a lot of game play information

Now that you have progressed your characters, you have learned many things along the way. And it is a good thing (yes,if there was audio I would have said that like Martha Stewart)  that you will want to share your knowledge with other players. How you communicate should be with compassion and not elitism. We have all been in situations where we want to express to someone that they can improve their game play. From rotations, to reforging to selection of glyphs etc, etc, there is just so much to learn in WoW, that some people struggle to get the game play down.

Where the problem lies is that oftentimes, people are not compassionate when they tell others that they are doing a "sub-optimal" job with their characters. I would like for all of you who are reading this to change how you talk to other player sand start using compassion for your fellow player.

Remember back when you first started playing? I certainly do, and I was and still am learning how to play. I make sooo many mistakes it's embarrassing at times. Now remember how you felt making those mistakes, and how oftentimes those around you in a group situation would respond. I am sure that you heard things like "kick them from the group" "they don't deserve that loot, their DPS was too low" "OMG you were last on the recount meter". Those things probably upset you and perhaps made you feel like you were not a worthy individual. Comments like these are not positive, constructive criticism that foster better game play.

This is what I am referring to as an "Elitist Jerk" someone who thinks that they know all there is to know about the game play and will tell you in whatever manner they want without taking your feelings into account. They lack compassion in how they speak to others.

Here are a few ideas that I came up with that you can use to be more compassionate in how you talk to others

  • Why not send an in game whisper to the person that has low DPS and ask politely if you can help
  • If you are in a guild, offer to mentor others in the class/spec that you have mastered, you can hold  "mini classes", do videos, run people through low level content,  etc
  • If you are on a group audio program, you can simply go to another chat channel in that program and speak to the person one on one
  • Watch you language, I am not saying that you should not feel like you can't cuss, but cussing at the other person does no good for anyone, cuss at the boss, or how such n such ability was nerfed ton the ground, but cussing at others only hurts them
  • Remember that when using meters, that someone will always be at the bottom of them - you never know when it may be you that's not topping the charts, so don't bash the one at the bottom
  • Remember that you too were once a "noob" and communicate in a manner that you would have liked for others to communicate with you and you still want others
If you are in a Guild, acting with compassion can be of utmost importance. Many guilds take their reputation on servers very seriously, and as a member, you are representing the Guild in your actions. I am not saying that you can't make mistakes. We all make mistakes, but when you bash another person, you run the risk of giving your guild a bad name on the server, as well as you run the risk of getting the /gkick  from the guild.

Conversely, if you are guild shopping, being a compassionate player can help you to get into a guild. Your personal reputation can be harmed when you are rude and mean to other players, and word can get around that you are not the type of person that people want to have in their guild.

Bottom Line Folks "Treat others how you want to be treated,,,with COMPASSION"

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